I'm Back...

Hello World, The big girl is back and building up motivation to once again attempt a body image cleanse. I don't have quite the motivation I had 2 years ago when I was preparing to stand on a porch and shake the hands of over 1,000 little college girls who were at their best and were yet to face the freshman 15, but I do have that itch to look better and not have muffin tops when I pull up my Wal-Mart jeggings. Really, what kicked me into gear was a little thing I have called a Suit Fetish. Let me catch you up-- I started law school last year and was so excited to finally have a reason to become obsessed with suits. My undergraduate major was Journalism. What.A.Joke. No offense to journalists, but no journalist can really get away with having a suit fetish. I always liked suits, so naturally, I needed to find a career that catered to that particular passion of mine. Business was clearly not going to happen, seeing as how I barely passed OCCC College Algebra, online. Therefore, law school and a legal career seemed like the best option. Once in, I was able to justify buying all the suits I wanted. Well for those of you who don't have a suit fetish/have no reason to own a suit (journalists)/anyone else who doesn't know how expensive suits are, they are really expensive. So while this fetish has been completely acceptable (I may have gone overboard on buying them, but what don't I go overboard on?), what is completely UNacceptable is the fact that I have eaten my way into a bigger suit size and can't afford to buy a big girl suit collection just to accommodate my love for Chinese/Mexican/Cajun/Anything Eatable Buffets. What makes a suit collection acceptable is the fact that you can get away with calling it an “investment” every time you buy a new one… oh grey, I need grey. Oh dark grey, well the light grey is light so I need the dark. Oh black, yes black is a staple, I will need two black ones. Oh navy? Well I didn’t even think of that! Yes, navy, I definitely need navy. Oh suit pants? Yes I need those, but this black doesn’t go with that black, so I will need the full suit to match…. This is just a glimpse into my reasoning… What you don’t see above is oh medium sized? Yes that will be good for the days that I am not eating my way through life/never, I will need this in 5 sizes so that I can cater to my Food Fetish… see, they just don’t work together. Food Fetish and Suit Fetish=enemies/the two opposites of the magnetic field. Which brings me to today, I have to lose weight so that I don’t bust out of my expensive investment into a suit wardrobe. I have been doing pretty good this past month (I know, you are wondering WHY I am just now blogging, sorry…), and in “pretty good this past month”, I mean eating for one and being STARVING 24/7. I think the worst part about dieting is that it really makes me think about food all.the.time. I mean, I do anyways when I am eating whatever my big heart desires, but when I am trying to be healthy, it is even worst. Non-dieting me= either starving, shoving my face with food or omg.so.full.cant.breathe/always thinking about my next meal Dieting me=either starving or starving/always thinking about my next meal BUT, I must say, the one harder thing than dieting is working out. As much as I hate dieting, I really hate working out. At least eating less takes no extra physical effort. If anything, it takes less physical effort than shoving my face with everything in sight. But to work out? Oh, I shutter just thinking about it. I have been “dieting” for a month, and so far the best I have done is to put on work out clothes one day and watch the Bachelorette on my DVR. I think that was my way of working myself up to a workout. I even put on socks and tennies… see? Progress. So here is what you can expect from me this time around: I will continue to attempt a healthy diet. This means more cottage cheese as meals and less cottage cheese as a way to describe my thighs. It also means that… I will start working out. I can’t be sure how this will turn out, but I did download an app on my phone for the “couch to 5k” thing, so maybe that? Or maybe I will just start getting the mail at the end of the driveway? The suspense of the cliff hanger is killing me, we will have to see. It feels great to be back. Stay hungry, I know I will!